My years

As we near the end of this current cycle and approach the beginning of a new one on January 22nd – when the Sun moves into the 41st hexagram – I find myself in review mode. We are ending a decade and beginning a new one – so what does the make up of the last several years look like? Well upon some looking back I came to reflect upon the following.

2015 – Year of the Empress brought me a deeper spiritual practice. It brought me my youngest son. I began to embrace my mystic gifts more and more and my deep connection with my femininity. I had to learn new ways to communicate my needs and learn how to meet the needs of my human offspring. I was tapping into my creativity in ways I hadn’t before and navigate how that started to set me apart from the people around me who didn’t understand the path I was traveling.

I began to appreciate the simple things in life and tap into the natural cycles of earth. This is the year that I started discovering the relationships that I was flourishing in and those that were experiencing trouble and strife. I started playing with divination tools and seeking mentorship in the areas I felt were calling me.

2016 – Year of the High PriesteSS continued to bring me an understanding of the power my intuition provided me. More than just “power” – it brought me clarity. My veil had been thinning and I was able to experience the mysterious world around me . The answers I sought were coming from within and it was liberating and a little freaky for me at first. It was easy to discount my inner knowledge as made up intel I wanted to believe – until my visions, my thoughts, the messages I received all began to become realities. I began manifesting material things that would blow my mind and excite me to continue practicing what I was learning. I am an independent, passive, and somewhat patient person. I need solitude and silence so that I can connect with my spiritual sources without intervention. I wanted to force my psychic development so much in the beginning and wanted the experiences that others had – until I truly connected with the High Priestess. Through that energy – I found that my sacred gifts and knowledge would flow through me at it’s own pace and it has – and it’s unfolded in ways that I could not have imagined.

2017 – Oh the Year of Boundaries. This was a doozy. Boundaries are not an easy thing to command – or well they weren’t then. I had not had my needs met in quite some time within many relationships, including my marriage, and I had been unhappy with the energies that I felt stuck in and that I was bringing my children up with. As the wife of a Veteran who dealt with the aftermath of war – the energies were very all over the place and unmanageable – even with my efforts and practices. It wasn’t just me living in my house after-all – when you have a smorgus board of energies it takes efforts from everyone to manage them. We decided to leave the house we were living in at the time and build a new one. I planted rose quartz chips under the foundation of our new home and we visited often as a family – having picnics on the ground that would become our home. Sending playful and loving energies into the earth that we had called our own. I had created crystal grids within the home we were selling and setting intentions and boundaries around who we would like to inhabit the dwelling we called home for many years. We ended up finding a buyer within a day of sharing that we were selling.

During this period – I continued to struggle to create boundaries around myself. As a mother, a wife, a successful career woman – I was accustomed to putting myself last and not putting myself as a priority. I was unsatisfied with my marriage, my job (the lack of time I had for my family), the lack of relationship with my parents and siblings as well as the relationship with the {large} extended family I once valued, and more. I was living a nightmare at times trying to figure out how to keep peace with everyone – when I had little peace within. I learned by the end of this year – that boundaries were the only way I was going to survive and truly tap into the magic I held within.

I decided to become a Life Coach and joined a program that would allow me the time and studies become just that. It was a decision I had been toying with for a long time – I thrive on helping others find their true power – their own strengths and gifts. It happened for me and I was so proud to have finally accomplished something I set out to do.

2018 – The Year of Death is the year that I began practicing Shamanism, sharing the basics of Human Design, Gene Keys, and more. This is the year I asked my husband to leave our home. The brand new home we had just built and moved into a good 6 months prior. Oh it was ugly – as death usually is. It was the death of the marriage I once had, the death of the “perfect little family” image I allowed others to think they witnessed, the death of being second to anyone for a second longer.

I met an amazing woman, let’s call her a Crone (most loving and wise), in January 2018 who would become a major part in my story for this year. She was/is my teacher in the Shamanic practice I was learning. This is the year I truly embraced my strategy and authority that Human Design taught me and the year that I began living through my shadows and gifts with the help of Gene Keys. It took many months to discover many different aspects of who I was physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. I was practicing my craft, my gifts, my intuition and I was helping others with the same. I obtained my certification as a Life Coach in January of 2018 and so proud of the work and dedication I had put into it.

I was continuing to set boundaries through this year as I experienced many endings. My husband and I were learning how to parent from different households while dealing with anger, hurt, sadness, loneliness, and much more. I was trying to find myself during this trying time while consoling very confused children who blamed me for ruining their lives and their family. This is also the year I decided to stop attending events with family members that did not make my heart happy, that did not bring me joy and comfort. If it didn’t light me up, light my children up, or even my husband – I wasn’t interested in it. If it wasn’t a benefit to our growth as individuals or as a unit *as broken as it was* – I wanted nothing to do with it. I was all about the death of things that did not serve the highest good of myself or my family.

My husband and I did reconnect later in the year and our marriage has prospered. Boundaries were set, changes made, and while we still have our struggles as all other humans who reside with one another every single day – we are gloriously happy now. We stopped living our lives according to the expectations of society and began living them on our own terms. We began a relationship based on authenticity and not judgement – whew. The death of many things – brought about the life we only dreamed of.

2019 – The Year of the Shaman was an exciting year. I was learning to live with my husband again in a more authentic manner. I had changed drastically in our time apart and even in the time we had reconnected. I grew through my gifts, my sovereignty, and my experiences. I began studying areas of shamanism that would teach me deeper understandings of healing, death, retrieving my own power and soul pieces that had fled in traumatic times. I connected with Gaia, Mother Earth, in ways I had not connected in previous years. I practiced grounding myself into the powers of nature, this gorgeous planet that supports our very existence. I was able to help many people on their journeys, hosted journeys that allowed others to gather information they needed to propel further into their path of discovery. I met a wonderful woman who I share much of my life with, who has amazing gifts of her own and uses them to enhance the magic that this planet offers. The first time we spent quality time together – we both saw spirits around us in the house and it was a very exciting experience to share with another person who hadn’t quite realized that I was able to see and play with energies and the “unseen”.

I built amazing relationships with men and women who were also very deeply connected to Earth, spirits, and ancestors. Practicing putting what we have learned with each other in sacred and safe spaces was one of my most favorite parts. Making drums and using them throughout the year in ceremonies, journeys, and healing sessions lit me up like nothing else. Using the elements of earth and the universe and showing and teaching others how to do the same to enhance their lives was awe inspiring. I had studied more about herbs and offerings from Gaia, Mother Earth, and using them in ceremonies and during different cycles of the moon and tapping into more than just my typical “kitchen witch” energies.

2020 has arrived and with the message that it shall be the Year of the Coven and embrace energies of The Magician. The Magician is numero uno in the tarot deck. The number represents new beginnings and opportunities – manifestation, resourcefulness and more. Using The Magician requires establishing clear visions and reasons for creations before acting upon them. Focused attention, intense concentration, and dare I say a soul connection to our goals and intentions is a requirement to be successful with this energy. We are powerful and creative beings and to work with The Magician is to harness the opportunity to bring our Higher Self in alignment with our day to day actions to create the life and future that we want. The personality of The Magician can be masterful, resourceful, and strategic. This personality may also include that of a high (or “over”) achiever so to speak, successful with the Law of Attraction as this energy is all about connecting with the Universe and the knowledge within and the application of them to the material realm.

I implore you to ask yourself:

  • What do you want to create and why? What is driving you to feel so strongly about this creation? What outcome do you seek?
  • What resources are available {now} to get started on this endeavor?
  • What actions do you need to take to begin manifesting your goals? What steps do you need to put into play to move forward with your plan?

I am looking forward to what 2020 has in store. I mention The Year of the Coven because I see myself surrounded by other souls who are in touch with their ability to harness The Magician this year in a much more authentic way than in the past. I am more than just a student now – I have manifestations/creations under my belt and skills that I have been able to put into practice over the past several years. I have morphed into the Student Teacher role of sorts for others and it feels really good to be able to teach others as I learn and lead by example. 2019 brought me eager and grateful souls that inspired me to push forward and here in 2020 I embrace those who find me to further my own discovery as I help them on their journey to deeper discoveries. I have collaborative projects underway with individuals that not only light me up but light up other realms with their sovereignty and mystical gifts. We all have them – we just have to be ready to explore them safely and with the right people.

May 2020 bring you all the adventures, the shadow work, the insights, and clarity needed to change the world one day at a time.

Shining Through The Shadows ~


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